Archive for ‘Design’

March 23, 2011

This Post Brought to You By Charlie Sheen. What?

You might be wondering why you have seen two projects (here and here) started but not finished. You see, I can explain. I started the desk and I started the puppy portrait, blogged about it and thought, “Wow! I am so awesome. I am so awesome at keeping up a blog and working on projects that I think I deserve a break.”

For lack of a more trendy explanation: Fail.

For some reason I am wired to think that functioning as a normal human being deserves a reward. Ate an apple? Now you can eat THREE Milky Ways! Took the dog on a walk? Now I can watch and entire season of Dexter in one sitting! …Because being active for twenty minutes obviously means you can lounge lethargically for eight to twelve hours the next day. Pardon the next trendy phrase that really sums this up: Winning. Duh! (Which clearly means losing.)

Self congratulations can really get you into trouble. Well, not BIG trouble. But enough trouble that I come up short on a lot of projects. My parents wised up to this eventually and quit funding projects until they were completed. They would reimburse me the entire amount of whatever sewing project I dreamed up or project I’d been puttering with. I can think of one time this actually happened.

Besides being over congratulatory, I have also been diagnosed with ADD. I was diagnosed at the ripe old age of 17 instead of having to get a Ritalin fix from the nurse in third grade like most kids.

I like shiny things.

Want another poster? I whipped up this one to keep myself on apples and not Milky Ways. Plus it is a little more work appropriate in case you feel like hanging it in your cubicle. When people ask where you got it just make sure to send them this way, but make sure they check out One Pretty Thing, too. She made this stuff popular. I just made it awesome.

Download the PDF here!

Apple A Day

March 18, 2011

It’s Friday! (Which Means Monday is Right Around The Corner)

There are a lot of reasons to be happy today, the most important of them being that it is Friday. Did you hear me!?

IT. IS. FRIDAY!!!

Also, I had my first Dunkin’ Donuts Iced Coffee. Is there anything in this world to be mad/sad/stressed about? The answer is, No. There isn’t.

Except then I got to thinking, “If I am this happy that it is Friday… How sad will I be when it is Sunday? Or worse… Monday?! I have an infinite amount of “Sunday Feeling” Sundays ahead of me! And Monday Feelings, too!? What does a double rainbow even MEAN?!”

Unfortunately, my glass flips from half full to “Who the h-e-double hockey sticks has been drinking my Dunkin’ Donuts deliciousness?!” rather quickly.

Maybe I should lay off the iced coffee. Or maybe just get a small next time.

But besides cutting back on the roasted brew binder, I should learn to get happy. I truly believe happiness is a habit… One that may be harder to develop than any nasty habit is to kick. There is no happiness patch or stick of happiness gum.

Sometimes, you just have to get happy about nothing.

(For your downloading pleasure: Get Happy PDF)

I’m not sure where the inspiration for this project came from besides the fact that I have been hoarding paint swatches, but I know this was wisdom imparted on me from my dear, sweet Gran. Her joyful demeanor touched all those she met. Turning lemons into lemonade was her specialty, though she would always take you up on an ice-cold Barq’s root beer.

I chose yellow because yellow makes me happy. What colors make you happy? Does green get you going? Pinks, please! If you’d like the same poster in a color that makes your heart flutter, go ahead and ask! I’d love to whip one up for you to print, frame and enjoy. Maybe a desktop wallpaper for your work computer? Just let me know!

March 14, 2011

Meet Jesse!

While I sometimes force Boyfriend to sit with me while I work on projects, for the most part I sand, paint and prime all by myself. At the end of a long day, working on a project like the little pink desk (seen here, here and here) helps my mind unwind and it is practically therapeutic. After pretending all day to be a grown-up, painting with no lines to consider or conversation to keep up is relaxing. I just want to getaway and these little projects are my sandy white beach.

On my grouchiest days I want to be alone while I work, with only trashy reality TV and a Diet Dr. Pepper to keep me company. However, without fail, someone always follows me down to my project hideaway in the basement. Not caring whether or not I want company or how bad my day was, Jesse is right on my heels as I descend the basement stairs… that is, unless he trips over his monkey and tumbles down to the bottom first.

Meet Jesse:

Jesse doesn’t really belong to me. He is kind of a rental… but don’t tell him I said that. His situation is confusing enough as it is for his tiny little dog brain. You see, his dad (one of my very best pals) lives in Wichita and has a job that requires him to travel with very little notice. He sends Jesse a check every month for his upkeep and stops in to say hi when he is in this neck-of-the-woods. We came up with this plan without stepping foot in a court room. (Well, pretty much I volunteered to watch the little guy until something more permanent comes along.) I would say he is the kind of my favorite thing out of all my stuff but that will give him a big head.

And sometimes he eats poop.

Jesse sprawls himself out on the floor of the Man Room (my dad’s workshop where I currently work on projects since it isn’t reliable weather outside yet) and faithfully waits until I decide I am done for the day.  As I start to close up the paint can, Jesse always scrambles to his feet, leans back on his hind legs to stretch, leans forward to stretch his haunches and shakes his fur free of dust and wood shavings from past projects. He languidly walks to the door and waits for me to go upstairs. As we climb up the stairs, Jesse’s tail is always wagging and I am always glad he was there to keep me company.

As a little “Thanks For The Temp Dog!” for Jesse’s dad, I busted open a box of 96 Crayolas and colored a card from the both of us. It was cute and it smelled like kindergarten but I think we could do better. Project details to come!

February 28, 2011

Stuff Solution

I am a fake and a total phony. I wasn’t always this way. No… a few short months ago I was just “me” and now I am a big faker. Everyday I pretend to be a real-life, living and breathing grown-up. Let me tell you what… It is killing me. Before landing a spot in the Real World (not to be confused with the television show that more accurately depicted my previous life) I would wake up and… Wait. Some days, the most taxing thing I would do would be getting up.

But nowadays, I have to pretend that getting up, getting dressed and not hanging out in a t-shirt and undies all day comes natural to me. To be at work at 8:00 am I roll out of bed at 7:00. (Okay, fine. 7:20. And that is after hitting my snooze and resetting my alarm because for some reason I thought I might actually get up and exercise, or at the very least, shower.) In order to give the illusion of a fully functioning adult, I have determined that I need some stuff.

Stuff is the cure-all for any problem. Messy room? Head to target for some organizational stuff! Flabby abs? New spandexy workout stuff. Unsightly blemishes? Stuff! Stuff! Stuff! The problem, however, with all this stuff is this: Stuff won’t solve any problems if you don’t use it correctly. Sure, shove an organizational tub in the corner you have a handy new place to hold a pile of clean unfolded laundry. Three pound free weights make great door stops. Three bottles of Proactiv next to my bathroom faucet are just squatty plastic statues that remind me that (just like me) Katy Perry, Julianne Hough and Jessica Simpson all have breakouts from time to time. So, what is my solution to these unused solutions? One more thing.

(By the way, a “thing” is a the singular term for an item of  “stuff”)

When I was in high school, I tutored children from a nearby homeless shelter after schools. Together, we would work through work sheets. And by together, I mean I completed most of the worksheets with my left hand to make it look like the kids did it. What can I say? I wasn’t cut out for elementary education. (Or any job really for that matter…) I actually enjoyed doing the worksheets, though. Tracing over dashed letters of the alphabet and matching nouns to adjectives really suited me. I suppose that is where the inspiration for this poster came from.

It is easy enough. Fill in four goals you would like to complete each day and color in the corresponding circles each day. The goal is to have a poster covered in ink, rather than empty like this one is now.

Feel free to click and download the link below and join me in 12 weeks of goal dominating. Because you’ll never know how much you can do until you get up off your ass and do it. (But don’t hold me to that… I am starting over on Monday.)

Goal Stuff

(Wrote this on Friday… Not sure the Starbucks and Pumpkin Bread count as healthy…)